Thursday, October 13, 2011

Things to Note

What have I become?

I lamented the other day that my life has become this dizzying array of predominantly worthless things that I am stringing together to try to make a meaningful life for myself.  And before you start thinking that I am unhappy- you just need to take one giant step back.

Because even though the things I do might seem small in certain ways, I am without a doubt aiding and affecting more people's lives than I probably ever have before.  And that is kinda beautiful. 

So, in the midst of all this, I have realized that I really only have about two things I can speak on with any authority at all.  And those things are... drumroll please...

Lean Cuisine Steamers and new Fall television.

I know... I know.  I would like to retain a shred of dignity by pointing out that no matter how helpless I become, I will not go back to the days of regular Lean Cuisine's.  The horror... Oh no.  I am firmly rooted in the Steamer category, and feel that in some ways this gives me a sense of cultured sophistication.

...I should stop trying, huh?

So here are my observations based on weeks upon weeks of scurrying home for my gourmet dinner at 8:30.  I work long hours, folks.  These things are godsends when it's 8:30 pm.

Er, some of them are.  Read on.

Chicken Margherita: Last night I had the great displeasure of experiencing this.  Let me tell you... it was rough.  The green stuff (still not quite sure what it was) clumped up and became super soggy in the microwave, the tomatoes turned orange and the chicken required a steak knife to cut.  My rating: 3/10. Next!

Chicken Poblano: I was really looking forward to this gem.  It came highly recommended by my sister and I looked foward to the spicy goodness inside.  And, well, the green beans were funny.  They didn't taste like green beans.  Maybe that is an effect of the freezing, thawing, and cooking with weird sauces, but they threw me off.  And my pack was LOADED with green beans.  Rating: 5/10.

Shrimp Scampi:  I should know better than to try frozen shrimp.  There is just a disconnect somewhere... Possibly due to the fact that they have been dead for months now.  Eww... Rating: 4/10.

Sweet and Spicy Ginger Chicken: Now we're talking.  Although I could certainly do with less broccoli, (who couldn't?) this just might earn a regular spot in the freezer.  The flavors were interesting enough to keep me from contemplating the meat quality too much, so that makes it a winner in my book.  Rating: 8/10.

And last but certainly not least: Chicken Pot Stickers.  These babies are good.  Ironically they were the first ones I picked up, and there is almost nothing offensive in these.  Pot stickers (I mean, come on- in a LEAN CUISINE?) edamame, (which is basically a food group in my life) and water chestnuts.  What are these things, by the way? Do they fall into the potato category?  Do they grow in those small discs?  I don't know and I don't really care because they just have such a satisfying crunch to them. The only problem I have with this one- sometimes if the sauce isn't totally covering the stickers, you can end up with weird hard crunchy patches.  Nevertheless, 9/10.  Winner winner chicken dinner. 

And on to the second regular feature in my life... the ever-elusive and thrilling television.

It's been a good premiere season folks, and I feel it is my duty as a resident of Hollywood to tell you what I think about all things entertainment related.  If you don't agree- well you can stop reading.  I am fairly opinionated about what I think makes the cut- and as Taylor from "Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" would say, "I finally found my voice and I'm not afraid to use it."

And there went my credibility.

Anyhoo... I have found three favorites.

Revenge, Hart of Dixie, and American Horror Story.

Revenge is kinda great, even though I'm shamefully only one episode in.  Whatever.  I'll catch up.  The poster alone makes it worth watching.

Hart of Dixie: Aside from the fact that I think Rachel Bilson is a terrible actor, there is something really charming about this super cheesy, super old-school WB feeling show.  I mean, one of the lead character's names is "Lemon" for Pete's sake.  But Jason Street makes many appearances, and has so convinced me.  Dillon Panthers for Life.

And last but certainly not least...
I'm going to go ahead and vehemently recommend that no one under the age of 18 and no one over the age of 30 even give this one a shot.  It is weird and scary and certainly nothing like the Tami Taylor I know and love.  But it's also fascinating.  Who is that man in the weird black rubber suit?  Why do the house residents think it's okay to keep pickled bottle parts laying about?  So many questions, so few answers.

But Tami Taylor is still rocking that hair.  Between P-Dubs and Tami Taylor, I'm really wanting to dye my hair red.  I mean, we're talking about two of my role models here, and they are both redheads.  Now, before you go crazy, I would be aiming for the strawberry variety. Thoughts? Opinions?

Until next time, I'll be eating pot stickers and watching bad reality television.  I just won't tell you about that part.




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